Green River Star -

By David Martin

A dangling road annoyance


Driving along throughout Sweetwater County, it’s easy to become annoyed with one’s fellow motorist.

I’m not annoyed too much with people who make a turn without using their signal or someone passing by me at 95 mph on Interstate 80. Those sorts of situations are understandable, even if the other driver is singing along to Taylor Swift’s latest breakup song on their way to karaoke.

What I fail to grasp, and what never fails to annoy me, are the decorations and pieces of flair people sometimes stick on their vehicles. The worst are those neon-colored plastic testicles people attach to the hitch of their trucks. You don’t normally see these things on older trucks or even trucks with most of the manufacturer’s standard options still installed. They’re normally attached to lifted another 3 feet off the ground or those trucks that look like they’ve just come off a ranch and are way too expensive to actually be used as a ranch truck.

I caught sight of a truck with this kind of enhancement a few days ago and I couldn’t help but stare at it.

I was stopped at a light with the truck in question directly ahead of me, a light blue bit of plastic molded in the shape of a bull’s pride hanging from beneath the trailer hitch. My mind immediately drifted to questions of who would put something like this on their truck in the first place.

Is the driver trying to say their truck has a lot of get-up-and-go? Is it a statement on how the driver has the testicular fortitude to do what needs to be done? Why did they decide blue is a good color?

I get the desire to decorate a vehicle with something that a driver might find either humorous or a display of how manly they are. But, these plastic additions rank up there with anything attached to a vehicle displaying the f-word, including something displaying a “f--- cancer” message, a statement I can certainly get behind.

The point is, one person’s decoration is another person’s annoyance. Though, being an annoyance might be the point of the installing something like that in the first place.


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